Using Enneagram Stances for Growth - Types 1, 2, 6
Hey beautiful people! We hope the summer is treating you well! Here in Chattanooga, TN, the temperature has been scorching and consistently in the 90s, and I don’t think it’s rained for almost 2 months. Rain would be so refreshing!!
Last week’s blog provided an overview of Enneagram stances and orientation to time. This week, we’ll dive deeper into using this information for self-discovery and growth. We are kicking off with Types 1, 2, and 6.
Critical Point: As you dive into using stances for growth, you need to be confident in your personality type for the information to have the greatest impact. If you’re unsure, we can help coach you to identify your core personality type. Start here.
Repressed Centers
Stances are defined by which center is repressed, representing parts of ourselves we don’t use productively. The Dependent (Compliant) Stance, for instance, represses thinking.
As a Type 2, The Helper (that’s me 🙂!), thinks a lot, though not always productively—often fixating on relationships for about 80% of the time!
It's important to make decisions objectively and trust your judgment, even with tendencies to overthink.
Dependent (Compliant) Stance: Types 1, 2, and 6
This group:
Looks outside themselves to get their needs met, asking questions like “How am I?” “How loved am I?” and “How safe am I?”
Is present-focused and often conforms to the time orientation associated with the person they are helping or with.
Is known as thoughtful, present, and kind.
Gives power to others and relies on feedback to determine how they are doing.
For a Type 2, stepping into new experiences requires trusting in yourself without relying on external validation.
After conducting a new workshop last week, as a Type 2, I found myself searching for external validation. At first, I didn’t realize it, but it dawned on me that the lost or unsure feeling I felt was coming from seeking external validation and wondering if I did okay or was okay.
Given my work with self-awareness and growth, I was able to redirect my need for others to tell me I did a good job.
While it wasn’t easy, I know it was worth it, as building confidence from within is valuable and empowering—a life-long skill!
Goal: Know yourself from the inside out instead of outside in.
Tips for Growth for Types 1, 2, and 6
Type 1: The Reformer
Make sure striving for perfection doesn't undermine your self-worth: While seeking excellence, maintain a healthy balance where your self-worth isn't solely dependent on achieving perfection.
Separate doing and feeling: Be less emotionally attached to what you do. Cultivate a mindset where you can perform actions and make decisions without being overly emotionally attached to the outcomes or the process itself. This leaves room for soul work and finding peace.
Non-judgmental observation: Try to observe yourself without judgment. Notice all that’s wrong or should be different, but without letting it affect your self-esteem.
Type 2: The Helper
Build confidence: Engage in new activities without seeking affirmation from others. Trust your judgment and decisions.
Balance thinking and feeling: Avoid overthinking by setting boundaries and focusing on productive thoughts.
Self-validation: Practice self-validation to reduce dependency on others for feeling good about yourself. Know that you are valued for everything you do without exhausting yourself to do it.
For fellow Type 2’s, here are powerful questions to ask yourself by Suzanne Stabile to give your life more balance and focus.
"What is mine to do?"
"Why am I moving towards this other person?"
"What, if anything, do I expect to get in return?"
"Does the person even want my help?"
Type 6: The Loyalist
Trust in yourself: Build inner trust and self-reliance. Challenge your doubts and anxieties by taking calculated risks.
Develop independence: Work on making decisions without constantly seeking external validation or reassurance.
Practice mindfulness: Stay present and manage your anxiety by grounding yourself in the current moment and your capabilities.
Your homework… Reflect on your stance and time orientation.
How do they influence your daily interactions and decisions? What strengths and challenges do they present?
Understanding these aspects can truly empower you on your journey toward greater self-awareness and personal growth.
Remember, the journey of self-discovery and growth is ongoing, and each step forward is progress. ❤️
Stay tuned for more insights next week!
On your side and in your corner,
Lori
